A Very Beautiful Advice

By : Anonymous ( from hidayahnet@yahoogroups.com)

A simple man tells how his booking an air ticket for his father, his first flight, brought emotions and made him realize that how much we all take for granted when it comes to our parents.

My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never traveled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on lufthansa.

The moment I handed over the tickets to him, he was surprised to see that I had booked them by air. The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting for the time of travel. Just like a school boy, he waspreparing himself on that day and we all went to the airport, rightfrom using the trolley for his luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for window seat and waiting restlessly for the security check-in to happen.

He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was overcome with joy watching him experience all these things.

As they were about to go in for the security check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes and thanked me. He became very emotional andit was not as if I had done something great but the fact that this meant a great deal to him.

When he said thanks, I told him there was no need to thank me.

But later, thinking about the entire incident, I looked back at my life.

As a child how many dreams our parents have made come true. Without understanding the financial situation, we ask for football, dresses, toys, outings, etc. Irrespective of their affordability, they have satisfied to all our needs. Did we ever think about the sacrifices they had to make to accommodate many of our wishes?

Did we ever say thanks for all that they have done for us?

Same way, today when it comes to our children, we always think that we should put them in a good school. Regardless of the amount of donation, we will ensure that we will have to give the child the best, theme parks, toys, etc. But we tend to forget that our parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young, it is our responsibility to ensure that they experience all those and their life is complete.

Many times, when my parents had asked me some questions, I have actually answered back without patience. When my daughter asks me something, I have been very polite in answering. Now I realize how they would have felt at those moments.

Let us realize that old age is a second childhood and just as we take care of our children,the same attention and same care need to be given to our parents and elders.Rather than my dad saying thank you to me, I would want to say sorry for making him wait so long for this small dream. I do realize how much he has sacrificed for my sake and I will do my best to give the best possible attention to all their wishes. Just because they are old does not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also. They have wishes, too.

Take care of your parents...apprecite their presence...

Konsert Rentaq Serantau Wajib Dibatalkan

SURAT PEMBACA 18 JANUARI 2007

Saya ingin merujuk kepada iklan penganjuran Konsert Rentaq Serantau yang akan diadakan pada hari sabtu 3 Februari 2007 di Stadium Melawati Shah Alam. Konsert tersebut yang dianjurkan oleh Syarikat Telekomunikasi Digi bakal menampilkan empat penyanyi terkemuka dari Malaysia dan Indonesia iaitu Search, Ella, Radja dan tidak ketinggalan Inul.

Bak ungkapan Pepatah Melayu “Alah bisa tegal biasa”, penganjuran konsert seperti di atas sudah biasa diadakan apatah lagi melibatkan artis-artis tempatan mahupun dari Indonesia, namun apabila sesebuah konsert itu menampilkan Inul maka pasti majoriti Masyarakat Malaysia risau dan gusar akan keterlibatan artis tersebut untuk membuat persembahan.

Kehadiran Inul pasti sekali lagi menimbulkan kontroversi, terutamanya apabila beliau menari dengan tarian yang menggairahkan sambil menyajikan goyang gerudinya. Lantas timbul satu persoalan, apakah goyang gerudi inul itu sudah dihalalkan di negara ini untuk dipertontonkan kepada umum? Umum mengetauhi Malaysia sebagai sebuah negara Islam contoh harus dijauhkan daripada sebarang unsur-unsur yang cuba memberikan impak negatif kepada status ke Islaman Malaysia itu sendiri.

Apakah dengan niat untuk berhibur dan memikirkan keuntungan semata-mata, maka kita agak lunak di dalam membiarkan artis yang lebih goyang punggung daripada menyanyi hadir dan melekakan malah pasti menaikkan syahwat penonton-penonton konsert berkenaan yang kebanyakkanya terdiri daripada golongan muda dan pelajar.
Apakah semata-semata untuk menunjukkan kita bersikap toleransi terhadap fenomena budaya global, maka kita sanggup melihat idealisme, spiritualisme serta intellektualisme generasi muda kita dicabut tanpa kita sedari?

Di dalam melihat perkara di atas sudah tentu, beban kesalahan tidak harus diletakan kepada Inul itu sendiri, tetapi kepada pihak berwajib yang menjemput beliau untuk membuat persembahan terbuka kepada khalayak ramai.

Masyarakat Malaysia secara umumnya masih belum boleh menerima Inul untuk membuat persembahan di negara ini, memandangkan gaya persembahan beliau yang dikira lucah malah memalukan untuk ditonton.

Apakah pihak penganjur konsert berani untuk memberikan jaminan agar beliau tidak menyajikan goyang gerudinya ketika membuat persembahan?

Dan jikalau ada jaminan pun, konsep persembahan beliau tidak sesuai malah bertentangan dengan syarak, adat dan budaya ketimuran yang masih menjadi pegangan dan jati diri Masyarakat Malaysia.
Seharusnya pihak penganjur harus peka terhadap pelbagai usaha yang dijalankan oleh semua pihak terutamanya pihak kerajaan di dalam memastikan golongan muda di Malaysia membangun dengan keberdayaan akal fikiran yang sihat dan menjauhi gejala-gejala yang merosakan terutama yang menghakis akhlak dan sahsiah generasi muda.

Penganjuran konsert sedemikian pasti bertentangan dengan usaha terkini yang dibawa oleh Perdana Menteri Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi di dalam melancarkan Pelan Induk Pembangunan Pendidikan untuk mempertingkatkan kualiti pelajar. Di dalam halaman 67 pelan berkenaan, pemugaran kepada usaha-usaha cintakan ilmu pasti akan tidak kesampaian apabila penganjuran konsert-konsert seperti di atas dibudayakan malah diberikan publisiti meluas kepada masyarakat dan generasi muda yang pasti dahagakan cinta gejala hiburan melampau pula.

Penganjuran sesuatu konsert itu tidak salah asalkan ianya diurus dan diisi dengan program-program yang tidak merosakkan nilai, jatidiri serta akhlak penontonya.

Justeru, memikirkan bentuk pengisian konsert Rentaq serantau tersebut serta kesan-kesan negatif yang bakal dirasai oleh generasi muda dan Masyarakat Malaysia, konsert sedemikian wajib dibatalkan.


Oleh :

MUHAMMAD BUKHORI BIN ALIAS
Setiausaha Agung
Persatuan Kebangsaan Pelajar Islam Malaysia (PKPIM)

Puasa Asyura

Petikan dari kitab Puasa Majlis Fatwa Tetap Arab Saudi-jilid 4 ms.121

Berpuasa pada hari Asyura dapat melupuskan dosa tahun sebelumnya.

Rasullullah SAW bersabda, maksudnya:
"Berpuasa pada hari Arafah, aku berdoa agar ALLAH menghapuskan dosa bagi tahun sebelumnya dan tahun selepasnya dan berpuasa pada hari Asyura, aku berdoa agar ALLAH menghapuskan dosa tahun sebelumnya." (Hadith diriwayatkan oleh Muslim:1162)

Inilah limpahan rahmat daripada ALLAH dimana dengan berpuasa sehari dapat melupuskan dosa sepanjang tahun. Rasullullah SAW sentiasa menunggu untuk berpuasa Asyura kerana ganjarannya sangat besar.

Ibn. Abbas r.a berkata, maksudnya:
"Aku tidak pernah melihat Rasullullah SAW begitu berusaha untuk memastikan baginda berpuasa pada mana-mana hari tertentu kecuali hari ini, iaitu hari Asyura dan bulan ini bulan Ramadhan."
(Diriwayatkan oleh al-Bukhari: 1867)

Apa yang dimaksudkan dengan berusaha untuk memastikan baginda berpuasa ialah baginda ingin mendapatkan ganjaran pahala berpuasa pada hari itu. Kedua, berkaitan dengan alasan Rasullullah SAW berpuasa pada hari Asyura dan menggesa orang ramai mengikuti jejaknya telah diterangkan di dalam hadith Ibn. Abbas r.a beliau berkata, maksudnya:

"Rasullullah SAW datang ke Madinah dan melihat orang Yahudi berpuasa pada hari Asyura. Baginda berkata: Apakah ini? Mereka menjawab: ini hari baik. Inilah hari di mana ALLAH menyelamatkan Bani Israil daripada musuh-musuh mereka dan Musa berpuasa pada hari ini. Baginda bersabda: Kami lebih berhak kepada Musa berbanding kamu. Jadi baginda berpuasa pada hari tersebut dan memberitahu orang ramai agar berbuat demikian."
(Diriwayatkan oleh al-Bukhari: 1865)

Perkataan ini hari baik mengikut versi yang diriwayatkan oleh Muslim:
Inilah hari kebesaran di mana ALLAH menyelamatkan Musa dan pengikutnya dan menengelamkan Firaun dan pengikutnya.
Perkataan dan Musa berpuasa pada hari ini, Muslim menambahkan di dalam riwayatnya, maksudnya:
"Sebagai tanda bersyukur kepada ALLAH, kami berpuasa pada hari ini."
Mengikut satu lagi versi yang diriwayatkan oleh al-Bukhari, maksudnya:
"Jadi, kami berpuasa bagi membesarkan- Nya."

Perkataan dan memberitahu orang ramai agar berbuat, mengikut satu lagi versi yang di riwayatkan oleh al-Bukhari, maksudnya:
Baginda berkata kepada para sahabatnya: "Kamu lebih berhak ke atas Musa berbanding mereka, maka berpuasalah pada hari ini."

Ketiga, pelupusan dosa hanya diperoleh melalui berpuasa Asyura merujuk kepada dosa-dosa kecil. Berhubung dengan dosa-dosa besar, ia memerlukan taubat yang berlainan.

Al-Nawawi r.h berkata:
"Berpuasa pada hari Arafah melupuskan semua dosa kecuali dosa besar."
Kemudian beliau berkata:
"Berpuasa pada hari Arafah melupuskan dosa dua tahun dan berpuasa pada Asyura melupuskan dosa satu tahun dan jika ucapan "amin" seseorang itu serentak dengan ucapan "amin" para malaikat, dosanya sebelum ini dilupuskan. Setiap perkataan yang disebut mungkin membawa kepada pelupusan dosa. Jika dia melakukan sesuatu yang melupuskan dosa kecil, maka dosanya terampun. Jika dia tidak ada dosa kecil atau dosa besar, ia akan dicatatkan sebagai amalan baik dan martabatnya dinaikkan. Jika terdapat satu dosa besar atau lebih dan tiada dosa kecil, kami berharap agar puasa itu mengurangkan dosa besarnya.
(Al-Majmu' Syarh al-Muhazzab)

Syeikh al-Islam Ibn. Taimiyyah r.h. berkata:
Pelupusan dan pemurnian solat, puasa, puasa Ramadhan, Arafah dan Asyura, tergolong dalam dosa-dosa kecil sahaja
(Al-Fatawa al-Kubra, jilid:5)


Wallahua'lam..

Dipetik dari: http://www.al-qayyim.net/

Hm....

HasbiyAllah wani'mal wakiil...

Guruku...

Sedar tak sedar esok kita bakal menjejakkan kaki ke tahun hijrah yang baru... Serasa baru sahaja tahun 1427H datang bertamu...kini ia bakal meninggalkan kita... Namun itulah lumrah alam... Setiap pertemuan pasti ada perpisahan... Setiap permulaan pasti ada penghujungnya dan begitu juga setiap yang hidup pasti akan menemui ajalnya...

Dikesempatan yang terbatas ini, penulis mengambil kesempatan untuk mengucapkan " Selamat Menyambut Tahun Baru Hijrah 1428H... " Semoga dengan kedatangan tahun baru yang bakal menjelma akan membawa sinar baru kepada hidup kita untuk lebih menghayati Islam.

Tiada apa yang menarik untuk dikongsi buat kali ini.... mungkin kerana sudah agak lama tidak menulis maka idea pun sudah agak berkarat.... Semenjak penulis bekerja begitu terhad masa yang dapat penulis luangkan untuk penulisan maya. Namun insyaAllah jika diberikan Allah kesempatan dan juga masa terluang insyaAllah penulis akan cuba...

Minggu ini masih seperti biasa... Perjalanan seorang yang bernama pendidik... Berhadapan dengan kerenah para pelajar yang kadang kala menghiburkan dan tak kurang juga yang memedihkan hati. Namun itu semua tidak akan mematahkan semangat penulis untuk terus berkongsi ilmu bersama mereka. Bila sudah bergelar pendidik, baru penulis dapat merasakan perasaan seorang guru apabila pelajar-pelajar di hadapan kita tidak mengendahkan apa yang diajar, bila mereka hanya berbual-bual kosong di belakang dan tidak menghiraukan guru yang terjerit-jerit cuba untuk mengambil perhatian si pelajar.

Kadang-kadang penulis terkenang kembali salah seorang guru kesayangan penulis, Cikgu Ahmat Mahmud. Beliau merupakan bekas penolong kanan di sekolah penulis dan juga merangkap guru prep semasa penulis di tingkatan 4 dan 5. Penulis tidak menafikan bahawa Cikgu Ahmat merupakan cikgu yang garang dan tegas. Bayangkan ada seorang kawan penulis dibuang dari kelas prep hanya kerana menguap di dalam kelas semasa dia sedang mengajar... Namun di sebalik ketegasan beliau, tersimpan seribu pengajaran buat penulis...

Semenjak beliau mencadangkan untuk diadakan kelas prep di sekolah, hampir setiap malam beliau akan datang ke sekolah untuk mengajar kami subjek-subjek Sains seperti Kimia, Matematik Tambahan, Matematik Moden dan juga Fizik. Semua yang dilakukannya adalah secara percuma. Beliau telah banyak mengorbankan waktu malam yang sepatutnya dihabiskan bersama-sama keluarga untuk kami. Sehinggakan anak beliau akan menjawab "rumah ayah di sekolah" apabila ditanya oleh orang berkenaan ayahnya.

Penulis masih ingat lagi kepala penulis pernah diketuk dengan buku rujukan Kimia yang tebalnya 2 inci hanya kerana penulis gagal dalam subjek Kimia dalam satu ujian yang telah diberikan. Bergegar sekejap kepala otak penulis... hehe... Memang malu sangat masa tu... Mana taknya, diketuk di kantin sekolah... Di tengah-tengah pelajar-pelajar yang kebetulan baru tamat sesi persekolahan... Dan satu kelas penulis pernah juga didenda berlari keliling padang sekolah kerana kami gagal memberikan definisi yang tepat untuk JAR= Jisim Atom Relatif. :) Begitu banyak kenangan penulis bersama Cikgu Ahmat...Namun penulis tak pernah marah atau mengherdiknya... Malah kejadian itu penulis ambil sebagai satu titik permulaaan kepada sebuah harapan dan kejayaan. Semenjak itu penulis bertekad untuk mencuba sedaya upaya supaya tidak gagal lagi dalam mana-mana mata pelajaran dan Alhamdulillah dengan bantuan Allah segala urusan penulis telah dipermudahkan...

Pernah suatu ketika semasa penulis ditawarkan untuk melanjutkan pelajaran ke Tingkatan 4 di sekolah berasrama penuh, Cikgu Ahmat memanggil penulis ke biliknya. Dia memberikan kata-kata semangat kepada penulis dan mengingatkan penulis bahawa "Walau di mana juga kita diletakkan, orang yang hebat akan boleh berjaya... samada di asrama penuh atau di sekolah harian biasa..." Dia juga mengingatkan penulis bahawa " Hidup manusia di dunia ini seperti garisan lurus...Apabila garisan-garisan itu bertemu di antara satu sama lain maka kita akan bertemu... dan seterusnya apabila garisan-garisan itu telah melepasi titik pertemuannya... maka kita akan berpisah untuk meneruskan kehidupan..." Mengapa begitu sukar untuk penulis meninggalkan guru yang seorang ini... akhirnya penulis mengambil keputusan untuk terus bersekolah di sekolah lama penulis...Alhamdulillah keputusan yang penulis buat tidak sia-sia... :)

Raya tahun lepas penulis menghantar kad hari raya buat Cikgu Ahmat dan isteri. Hanya kad ucapan biasa sebagai tanda bahawa penulis masih mengingati jasa cikgu... dan untuk memberi tahu bahawa penulis juga telah mengikuti jejak langkah cikgu... menjadi seorang pendidik...

Namun persoalan yang masih bersarang di dalam fikiran penulis sehingga hari ini... Mampukah penulis merangkak untuk mengikuti setiap pengorbanan yang pernah cikgu berikan kepada penulis dan melaksanakannya kepada pelajar-pelajar penulis sekarang? Satu persoalan yang jawapannya masih jauh dan kelam....

Khas buat Cikgu Ahmat dan semua guru-guru yang pernah mendidik penulis... Rasanya jika jutaan terima kasih sekali pun masih tidak mampu untuk penulis membalas budi baik kalian... Hanya doa yang dapat penulis panjatkan buat kalian. Semoga Allah membalasnya...

Terima Kasih guruku... Jasa kalian tetap penulis kenang....

Pointers on Choosing Marriage Partners

By Rabi'ah Hakeem

We may list a few essential points to be considered by both brothers and sisters in the process of choosing a partner in life (although the masculine pronoun has been used throughout for the sake of simplicity, the following is generally equally applicable to both men and women).

1. Du'a. Unceasingly ask help and guidance from Allah, Most High, in the matter of finding and choosing a mate. As often as you feel it necessary, pray Salaah al-Istikhara, Islam's special prayer for guidance, in order to reach a suitable decision.

2. Consult your heart. Listen to what your inner voice, the 'radar' which Allah has given you to guide you, tells you about the prospective partner. It is likely to be more correct than your mind, which often plays tricks and can rationalise almost anything. For many people, first impressions are often the most accurate.

3. Enquire. Find out the reason why this man wants to marry you. Is he interested in you as an individual or will just any person do? Why is he not doing the logical thing, that is, to marry someone from his culture? If there is evidence that the primary reason for this marriage, despite claims to the contrary, is for convenience (greencard, money, property, etc.), forget it. This spells trouble.

4. Get to know your prospective partner, within the limits of what is permissible in Islam, before deciding on marriage. Just 'seeing' someone once or twice in the company of others, who may be anxious for this marriage to take place, is simply not enough under today's conditions, where two per- sons of totally dis-similar backgrounds are meeting each other without the safeguards of families. Without violating Islam's prohibition about being alone, try to understand his nature, what makes him tick, his temperament, what he might be like to live with.

5. Talk to several people who know your prospective partner, not just one, or have someone whom you can trust do this for you. Ask about him from various people, not just from his friends because they may conceal facts to do him a favour. And ask not only about his background, career, Islamicity, etc., but about such crucial matters as whether he gets angry easily; what he does when he is 'mad'; whether he is patient, polite, considerate; how he gets along with people; how he relates to the opposite sex; what sort of relationship he has with his mother and father; whether he is fond of children; what his personal habits are, etc. And find out about his plans for the future from people who know him. Do they coincide with what he has told you? Go into as much detail as possible. Check out his plans for the future - where you will live and what your lifestyle will be, his attitudes toward money and possessions and the like. If you can't get answers to such crucial questions from people who know him, ask him yourself and try to make sure he is not just saying what he knows you want to hear. Too many people will make all kinds of promises before marriages in order to secure the partner they want but afterwards forget that they ever made them, (this naturally applies equally to women as to men).

6. Find out about his family, his relations with his parents, brothers and sisters. What will his obligations be to them in the future? How will this affect where and under what conditions you will live? What are the character and temperament of each of his parents? Will they live with you or you with them? And are they pleased with his prospective marriage to you or not? Although it may not be the case in most Western marriages, among Muslims such issues are often crucial to the success or failure of a marriage, and answers to these questions need to be satisfactory to ensure a peaceful married life.

7. Understand each other's expectations. Try to get a sense of your prospective partner's under- standing of the marriage relationship, how he will behave in various situations, and what he wants of you as his spouse. These are issues which should be discussed clearly and unambiguously as the negotiations progress, not left to become sources of disharmony after the marriage because they were never brought up beforehand. If you are too shy to ask certain questions, have a person you trust do it for you. At an advanced stage of the negotiations, such a discussion should include such matters as birth control, when children are to be expected, how they are to be raised, how he feels about helping with housework and with the children's upbringing, whether or not you may go to school or work, relations with his family and yours, and other vital issues.

8. See him interacting with others in various situations. The more varied conditions under which you are able to observe your prospective partner, the more clues you will have as to his mode of dealing with people and circumstances.

9. Find out what his understanding of Islam is and whether it is compatible with your own. This is a very important matter. Is he expecting you to do many things which you have not done up to this point? If he emphasises " Haraams", especially if you are a new Muslimah, and seems unable to tolerate your viewpoint, chances are your marriage will be in trouble unless you are flexible enough to accommodate yourself to his point of view and possibly a very restrictive lifestyle. Let him spell out to you clearly how he intends to practise Islam and how he wants you to practise it as his wife so there will be no misunderstandings later.

10. Don't be in a hurry. So many marriages have broken because the partners are in such haste that they don't take time to make such vital checks as the ones outlined above and rush into things. Shocking as it may seem, marriages between Muslims which are contracted and then broken within a week or a month or a year have become common place occurrences among us. Don't add yourself to the list of marriage casualties because you couldn't take time or were too desperate for marriage to find out about or get to know the person with whom you plan to spend the rest of your life.

11. Ask yourself, Do I want this man/woman to be the father/mother of my children? If it doesn't feel just right to you, think it over again. Remember, marriage is not just for today or tomorrow but for life, and for the primary purpose of building a family. If the person in question doesn't seem like the sort who would make a good parent, you are likely to find yourself struggling to raise your children without any help from him or her - or even with negative input - in the future.

12. Never allow yourself to be pressured or talked into a marriage. Your heart must feel good about it, not someone else's. Again, allegations of "Islamicity" - he is pious, has a beard, frequents the Masjid, knows about Islam; she wears Hijab, does not talk to men - are not necessarily guarantees of a good partner for you or of a good marriage, but are only a part of a total picture. If an individual practises the Sunnah only in relation to worship or externals, chances are he/she has not really understood and is not really living Islam. Possessing the affection and Rahmah (mercy) which Islam enjoins between marriage partners is vital for a successful relationship, and these are the important traits to be looked for in a prospective partner.

13. Never consent to engaging in a marriage for a fixed period or in exchange for a sum of money. (Mut'a marriage). Such marriages are expressly forbidden in Islam and entering into them is a sinful act, as marriage must be entered into with a clear intention of it being permanent, for life, not for a limited and fixed duration.

If these guidelines are followed, Insha' Allah the chances of making a mistake which may mar the remainder of your life may be minimised.

Choosing a marriage partner is a most serious matter, perhaps the most serious decision you will ever make in your life since your partner can cause you either to be successful or to fail miserably, in the tests of this life and, consequently, in the Hereafter. This decision needs to be made with utmost care and caution, repeatedly seeking guidance from your Lord.

If everything checks out favourable, well and good, best wishes for happiness together here and in the Hereafter. If not, better drop the matter and wait. Allah, your Lord knows all about you, His servant, and has planned your destiny and your partner for you. Be sure that He will bring you together when the time is right. As the Qur'an enjoins, you must be patient until He opens a way for you, and for your part you should actively explore various marriage leads and possibilities.

Two words addressed to brothers are in order here. If you are marrying or have married a recent convert to Islam, you must be very patient and supportive with her. Remember, Islam is new to her, and chances are that she will not be able to take on the whole of the Shari'ah at once - nor does Islam require this, if you look at the history of early Islam. In your wife 's efforts to conform herself to her newfaith and culture, she needs time and a great deal of support, love, help and understanding from you, free of interference from outsiders. It is best to let her make changes at her own speed when her inner being is ready for them rather than demanding that she do this or that, even if it means that some time will elapse before she is ready to follow certain Islamic injunctions. If the changes come from within herself, they are likely to be sincere and permanent; otherwise, if she makes changes because of pressure from you or from others, she may always be unhappy with the situation and may look for ways out of it. You can help her by being consistent in your own behaviour. So many Muslims apply those parts of the Qur'an or Sunnah which suit them and abandon the rest, with resulting confusion in the minds of their wives and children. Thus, while firmly keeping the reins in your hands, you should look at your own faults, not hers, and be proud and happy with the efforts she is making. Make allowances, be considerate, and show your appreciation of the difficult task she is carrying out by every possible means. This will cause her to love and respect you, your culture, and Islam to grow infinitely faster than a harsh, dominating, forceful approach ever could.

Finally, a word of warning. Certain situations have occurred in which women, posing as Muslims (or perhaps actually having made Shahaadah), have deceived and made fools of numbers of Muslim men. Such women may be extremely cunning and devious, operating as poor, lonely individuals in need of help and/or husbands. The brothers who fall into this net may be shown false photos, given false information or promises, cheated in all sorts of ways, and finally robbed of anything the conniving lady can manage to take from them. As was said, it is wise to check out any prospective partner with local Muslims who know her.

Keep your eyes open and take your time. Since marriage is for life, for eternity, hurrying into it for any reason whatsoever is the act of a foolish or careless person who has only himself or herself to blame if things go wrong.